So I don’t want to disrespect the Mamas, or the Industry, but today this appeared on the online bulletin board, and I’m a bit shocked by it:

DEALING WITH THE TERRIBLE TWOS/(THREES?)
If your baby/ toddler is about to send you completely over the edge — maybe we can help! Have you tried everything but can’t seem get your child’s totally out-of control behavior under control? We are seeking parents with children (between the ages 8 months to 48 months) who have extreme behavioral problems to participate in a one to one-and-a-half day video shoot with a noted pediatrician/child behavior expert. This is for a major cable network presentation.

Your child must have a specific behavior issue that will almost surely manifest while we are shooting – for example: tantrums, food issues, sleep issues, or hitting and biting.

The shoot will take place in June. Please note, this is presentation tape and not guaranteed for broadcast, therefore there is no monetary compensation involved. However, you will be given the free guidance of a fantastic child expert.

If you are interested, please email your name, contact info, age of your child, specific “problem” behavior you’re dealing with and a photo of you and your child. Put the name “Toddler!” in the subject line of your email. Email your submission to: immediatetvcasting@gmail.com

I’m not a snob about reality TV.  I love it.  And maybe this expert can actually help your kids, and maybe someone out there reading this is thinking, “Wow!  What a great opportunity to help my toddler stop throwing tantrums and biting us all!”  And more than anything else, I really do understand what it’s like to work in the entertainment industry and to need ideas that appeal to a wide audience.  Sure, okay.

But I just can’t help thinking this is a bit exploitative.  So they need the kid to demonstrate his or her awful behavior on the show?   I mean, the kid’s first date is gonna be awkward enough, when you pull out all the baby pictures and videos, but then there comes the awful moment when you also drag out the evidence that he or she was out of control enough to be on a show about out of control kids.

Who takes their kid on a show like this?  ”Oh yes, River will definitely bite someone on camera.  I’ll make sure of it!”

Word to your mother: Slang from the mouths of babes

I’m sure moms and dads of teenagers can relate. For example,

Friends and relatives report that they are doing their own linguistics studies. “Ig” means ignorant. “Tight” means cool. “Low-key” means “I’m telling the truth.” “Slow your roll” means, “Not so fast” as in jumping to conclusions or overstepping a boundary. “Sexiled” means put out of your dorm room because your roommate wants privacy with her boyfriend.

The last one made me laugh out loud. If only I’d known that one in college!

[Via PatsPapers.com]

From the Huffington Post:

So many questions…

1) Why does this baby have so much pubic hair?

2) Why does this baby have hair suspenders

3) Why does this baby have hairy ankles?

I really would panic if my baby looked like this.

At Let’s Panic you’ll get lots of really great advice.  For example, this fantastic quiz helps you to interpret your baby’s cries and begins by asking the sensitive question:

What’s that sound coming out of Baby’s face-hole?

I also enjoyed reading “Your Post-Childbirth Vagina: Get To Know It!”

All that stretching and tearing and stitching. Will you ever be pretty again, down there? Will you ever be able to feature your vagina in your annual Christmas portrait?

Thanks to Molly for the link!